Tomorrow my parents are jetting off to Berlin for a short break. I guess that the time apart will be good for us again; sometimes it seems better to have these little bouts of interruption to the usual pattern of life. Going away in December should help me and I don't know, but maybe I will go and see OH - if he stays away for too long, which would provide more welcome interruptions. The whole interruption thing really helps with the getting on top of each other situation... that's not physically obviously, but more of a being in confined spaces with each other for too long... "driving family members up the wall" type thing.

So today was a weird day, not in a bad way, but I didn't wake up till late as I was talking till nearly 3 a.m. with OH on the phone - setting the world to rights because I couldn't sleep. Then when I woke up the next morning, I didn't feel like getting up due to The Virus so it was well past 3 p.m. when I finally got around to taking a shower. I actually finished cutting Millie's hair, which was a task I had started yesterday, but I needed mum to help hold her whilst I trimmed her face. I cut/trimmed the rest of her hair so she looks really smart now. She still needs a bath, but not too urgently so I guess I will do that tomorrow.

I have been progressing my way through the Dr. Phil book. It's quite good, though I feel it is a little unrealistic in places and the whole time I am reading it, I can mentally imagine him saying the words, which is a little wearing and freaky after a while.

I still feel slightly frustrated with myself for what I see as: wasting time. My routine is pretty much the same each day... (if I am at home) and consists of waking around 9 a.m. and then lying in bed until 10.30 or 11.30 a.m. watching TV as I come to. The get up, eat something, take a shower and (if I am well enough) get on with chores like washing, cleaning or cooking. In the afternoon I spend some time with my mum, rest, perhaps do some reading or if I am up to it... walk the dogs with her. Late afternoon, I come online and check my email, most days I do some of my BIL's website, talk to my friends and write my diary. After that I eat my dinner. About 8-10 p.m. I will come offline and either watch TV or go to bed and watch TV/read. Sometime later I call OH and then go to sleep.

As you can see, there is not much room for creativity!! I never do the things I mean to... like reading my coursebooks or making Millie her winter clothes and bows. I feel frustrated at myself for not doing more of what I mentally intend to do. It's as if my whole day is already tied up because I physically feel as if I am totally maxed out. I just need to alter my routine a little, even if it was to just allow 30 mins for reading some of my coursebook, or an hour for tidying and sorting through my room. I guess if I did that I might actually feel better in myself.